Well here I am, back at square and day one.  Its amazing how one little thing can make it throw in the towel, again.  I was so committed, I knew that the time was passing and getting closer to the time that I wouldn't think obsessively about drinking.  How did this happen?  So, I did some extra work for a client of mine.  While we were working she was talking about her family owning an Italian restaurant in New York.  We were talking about our love for Italian food and my love for cooking in general.  Then she asked me what kind of wine I drank.  Well, this wasn't the time for a confession, and I didn't have an answer prepared.  So, no harm done, I told her I liked Cabernet, Chianti, other reds.  End of discussion, no big deal.  I get home from work on Friday and low and behold, two bottles of red wine (very nice Cabernet) were sitting in my front gate, by the door.  Now, this is the part where I instantly poured out the bottles, and proudly walked inside.  Well, it actually isn't the time that I do that.  I called my husband, told him about the wine, and I said I'll start again tomorrow.  Once said, I was on a mission.  My mood was excited, I had "permission" to drink, the wine was a gift, what could it hurt?  
It didn't hurt that much that night.  Both bottles down, with me doing a running commentary on how I am feeling after each glass.  Then hubby and I watched a movie that neither of us could concentrate on, we went to sleep at 8:30pm.  Party on!  That started a day two of drinking because we were lazy, and hung over and it was Saturday.  We got in a yelling fight, went to bed angry.  Sunday I woke up depressed, I had to go to the office for a while, I couldn't bear "quitting" again on a Sunday while I was depressed (yes, I know alcohol is a depressant, I know) so I bought wine on the way home from the office.  Yesterday I had a long hard day, I didn't want to quit yesterday.  So, here I am today, I want to drink but I am not going to.  How did this innocent conversation about Italian food lead me to a weekend plus of drinking.  I need to keep my guard up.  I need to be aware of what I'm saying.  So, here I am at day one again.